HOW IT BEGAN

I was born in Kent and lived there until I was eight. Dad’s job took us to Canada for a few years, but we returned to the UK, this time settling in East Sussex. I passed my 11+ and went to a grammar school.

SCHOOL 

I didn’t like school, but I loved growing up in the village. I’m still in touch with most of the people I grew up with. It was idyllic. So far so good. I left school and went to work for a local garage in the parts department, but soon progressed to car sales, which was my dream job. I was 17, car mad and felt like I’d hit the jackpot.

DIVORCE 

But then my world changed when my parents split up. My parents divorce affected me significantly. I was stuck in the middle but not because they were fighting for custody of me (I was 17 remember). In fact, it could be argued that the opposite was true or at least that’s how it felt to me. Both parents loved and cared about me, but their actions at that time were focused on looking after themselves and their own heartache/survival.

MY OWN DIVORCE 

Fast Forward to 2016 and my marriage failed - there's a huge story to tell in between my parents divorce and my own, but that's for another day. What is certain, was that my divorce hit me hard.

The video below was recorded in April 2017 and posted on Facebook. I look back at the naivety of it now and the language that I use and I realise what a dark place I was in.

But, I DID HAVE GOOD PEOPLE around me and the self-awareness to know that I needed to do something about it; it wasn't up to anyone else, only I could decide to do the work. You've got to want to do the work. 

EMOTIONS

The emotions in this video are real. But, there was obviously a lot of masking going on too. I was kidding myself and attempting to kid everyone around me who cared, that I was OK. I use the word 'FINE'. I really don't like that phrase... "I'm fine". The sooner you can admit you're not fine, the quicker you can start healing.

VULNERABLE

Many men won't share their story. Some of you might say… “Just grow a pair”. You don't have to share your story publicly, but you definitely have to acknowledge any issues you're attempting to deal with yourself and get the support you need. Holding onto it or keeping it inside, locked away and filling you with poison, simply won't work.

GET THE HELP YOU NEED

So, if this has resonated with you and you're ready to 'DO THE WORK', I'd love to hear from you. Email me matt@mrmind.co.uk.